


I couldn't face a life without your lights

by louisandsass



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, American AU, Anal, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Louis, Enemies With Benefits, Eventual Smut, Exes to Lovers, Getting Back Together, Idiots in Love, Jealousy, M/M, Miscommunication, Recreational Drug Use, Riding, SUPER brief - Freeform, Some Fluff, Top Harry, side Ziam, sorry 'bout that lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:35:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27334291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/louisandsass/pseuds/louisandsass
Summary: Just tired of this.Louis was tired too. One moment Harry was possessive and all over him and the next he was throwing a tantrum and pretending Louis was at fault for everything. It's an old fucking routine. Maybe Louis had a hand in instigating it more than half the time, but that was beside the point.~ ~ ~Louis and Harry are college students who haven't been the same in the past two years.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik/Liam Payne
Comments: 14
Kudos: 80
Collections: 1d Breakup Fic Fest





	I couldn't face a life without your lights

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from "Snuff" by Slipknot :)

Louis sped out of his lecture class like someone lit a firecracker in his shoe. 

Class had dragged on since his professor insisted on covering every single detail in the current chapter they were studying. Louis doodled in the corners of his single page of notes until they were dismissed. He knew the subject well enough to get away with studying on his own. This class was supposed to be at a graduate level but it felt closer to an undergraduate level.

As he gathered his things, he caught someone making their way toward him with the clear intention of asking him out for the third time in a row. Louis just couldn’t shake that poor, oblivious boy, so he grabbed his book bag and nearly dragged it along as he exited.

Just a couple of paces down the hall, he bumped into someone and apologized profusely until they made eye contact and Louis registered the wide eyes, concerned look and careful hands coming up to steady him by the shoulders. A guitar was strapped to his back. It brought back unwanted memories. Louis shook him off, poorly suppressing an eye roll and choosing to hike up the strap of his bag to continue on his merry way. An afternoon of salty snacks and homework awaited him. 

Louis’ name followed him down the hallway. He held onto the strap as tightly as he held onto his dignity.

~~~

Louis arrived at a house party hosted by a friend of a guy he knew from his Sunday soccer league and while he made his rounds to greet friends and acquaintances over the loud mix of electric guitars and enthusiastic vocals, Louis spotted a head of shoulder-length curls loosely clipped back and askew. The curls bounced as the boy nodded along to a story that his group was sharing. They occupied most of the furniture in the den. Louis supposed he’d have to find another place to sit. An offensive dimple made an appearance when the boy turned his head to laugh at something a newcomer exclaimed. They soon became couch mates and sat closely like they knew each other. Curly Fry, as Louis gracefully nicknamed him since day one, gave the newcomer all of his attention as he made direct eye contact with his large, mossy green pupils. 

Louis ignored the pair as he strolled to a table littered with bottles and plastic cups. He concocted a Paloma with plenty of grapefruit and topped it with a lime wedge for aesthetics. The Tajín, which was essential for this mixed drink, was missing from the equation so he set out to find a bottle of it somewhere in this stranger’s house. Who hosted a party without the spice? Especially in Southern California.

On his way to the kitchen, Louis was intercepted by the classmate he’d avoided earlier. He politely accepted the conversation and barely listened to whatever Aaron (or Austin?) was saying. Louis had the habit of pretending to listen to guys who just wouldn't get a hint. This guy had a nice smile but Louis wasn't interested in his advances and stories about his wealthy family and their collection of jetpacks and hand gliders or whatever the hell he was oversharing. 

At some point, Aaron’s (probably not Austin’s) hand came up to rest against Louis’ chest, looking down at him and batting his eyelashes like they were trying to emulate a butterfly's wings. The drink in Louis held released condensation that made his hand feel clammy. He just wanted some Tajín and a decent distraction.

His eyes wandered away. Perhaps he’d catch a glance of someone and they’d get the hint from his pleading eyes that he needed to be rescued. Unfortunately, that was an awful plan because he made eye contact with the wrong person. _Abort!_ The pair of eyes had been zoned in on them before the contact was made. That much was obvious, judging by the eerie patience that Curly Fry was watching them with—like he thought he could blend into the surrounding crowd if he stood stock still. He was now unaccompanied and appeared to be focused on Aaron’s hand placement. Louis wondered what would happen if he leaned in just a little bit, cocked his hip and smiled coquettishly. Aaron seemed to gain confidence and moved a few inches closer. If Louis smiled a tad more, would the guy make a bolder move?

His mischievous thoughts derailed when a sharp elbow pressed against Louis’ arm, not enough to hurt but enough to make Aaron pause in his storytelling ( _thank God_ ) about attending fashion shows. He’d been leaning down to speak into Louis’ ear and now looked like he was close to snapping at the interruption.

“Um, hi?” Aaron greeted Curly Fry. He probably tried to mask his irritation. “You’re Nick’s friend. Harry, right?”

“Hey, Aiden. Yes, yes indeed. I need to borrow this one. Hope you don’t mind.”

 _Aiden_. Mystery solved. 

Harry didn’t wait for an answer. He thanked Aiden with faux politeness, pillowy lips pressed into a tight smile and hand reaching down to wrap around Louis’ wrist. He tugged gently and Louis followed wordlessly. They passed by their friend and teammate, Niall, who flashed them a dramatic smile and thumbs up. They ignored him.

When they reached the foot of the stairs, Louis’ drink sloshed in his free hand as they stepped around a couple engaged in a loud conversation. Harry loosened his hold, which was a perfect opportunity for an escape. They stared at each other for a long moment, music pulsing around them, eyes roaming around each other’s faces. Harry gestured for Louis to climb the steps ahead of him like the perfect gentleman that he is and Louis stupidly led him into the first empty bedroom he came across. He swayed on the spot because anxiety shot through him. They'd been in similar situations. Many times, actually. They pushed each other until subsequently falling into each other and all over each other. It was intense.

Harry must have mistaken Louis’ anxious swaying for a drunken sway because he took the drink from him and sniffed it. He made a face that Louis wanted to intensify. 

“Try it. Go on.” 

Harry wasn’t a drinker. Louis had seen him get high before but never had he seen him drink alcohol and actually enjoy it. Harry looked him dead in the eye while he took a small sip. The twist of his lips made a cackle rumble from within Louis. In the dim lighting supplied by the full moon outside, Louis watched the look on Harry's face morph to disgust. 

“What is this supposed to be?”

“It’s a Paloma, you uncultured swine. It’s missing Tajín. But you wouldn’t be able to handle that either.”

“You're a dick, y’know?”

Louis crossed his arms. “Yeah, and?” 

Shaking his head, Harry created distance between them and ceremonially set the cup down on a dresser. He looked back at Louis and copied his stance, biceps bulging where his arms crossed. 

“Grimshaw, Louis?” 

Hearing that last name reminded Louis of the lanky guy who had been flirting with Harry or whatever—it didn’t matter. _Nick Grimshaw_. Louis saw him at his Sunday games and around campus from time to time. He didn't know much about Nick except that he was like, way older than them. Why was he even at this party? 

“Are you trying to see how our names would sound together?”

Harry grunted but otherwise refused to comment. 

“I think it has a nice ring to it,” Louis pressed. “Grimshaw, Louis. A bit formal, don’t you think?” 

“Shut up.” 

“Louis Grimshaw doesn’t sound bad—” 

The rest of that was swallowed by Harry’s mouth. His lips latched onto Louis’ as they moved fervently against his. Something took over Louis’ body while he stood there, pliant and with his hands trapped between their bodies. Harry's big hands roamed over his spine. They settled on the dip of Louis’ waist and the press was soft. Even when he was worked up from arguing, Harry always balanced his actions with softness and gentle touches. It never made any fucking sense. 

They did this at least once a week. Sometimes more. Sometimes they’d end up grinding against each other, their clothes never leaving them as they engaged in some mindless over-the-clothes groping because there wasn’t time to stop and think. Louis wanted to hate it, he really did, but he'd be lying to himself. He rather enjoyed it and he craved the way Harry reacted to Louis' provocations. Especially when it went further and it involved less articles of clothing.

Louis felt himself being led away from the door and towards some stranger’s bed. He let it happen. He let his legs fall open. He let Harry settle in between them. He let Harry's tongue slide into his mouth. He let Harry caress his face to deepen their kiss. He let his body move in tandem with Harry as he pressed him against the mattress.

It was always hot and it usually ended with one of them coming too soon. It wasn't the classiest way to end their pointless arguments but it felt good and it was a good distraction from reality.

Louis shifted his hips and enjoyed the way Harry gasped into his mouth. They kissed so much their lips started to chap. Harry pulled back to take a deep breath. He hovered over Louis, watching him like he wanted to say something meaningful. It was in his eyes and on the tip of his tongue. Louis pulled him back down, nose-to-nose, and derailed his obvious intentions of ruining the moment with sweet words. 

Easily distracted, Harry's mouth wandered, trailing kisses along Louis’ jaw until his teeth settled on a spot behind his ear. The internal struggle was tough but Louis couldn't handle being marked by him. He took Harry's face in his hands and eased him away. Harry looked at him with open confusion and just like that, the heat of the moment was gone. He rolled off and made for the door. 

“Curly?” 

“No marks. I know.” 

“People might ask questions.”

“I know,” he deadpanned, face stoic.

“What's with the attitude?”

“Just tired of this.”

Louis flipped him the bird.

Harry did it back. “I'll see you around, dick.” 

“Are you talking to my dick or me?”

Harry slammed the door without answering but Louis thought he caught a barely concealed smile.

With what little dignity he could muster, Louis crept out of the bedroom and rejoined the party downstairs. The atmosphere had shifted. Most people were either very tipsy or high or both. Or maybe he hadn’t noticed earlier. The kitchen smelled like Zayn's kind of party and yup, there was Zayn in the center of it. Louis went straight for his best friend, nearly cuddling into his side but not quite. Zayn wasn't much for public displays of affection but Louis needed affection so he thought he'd try. 

“Didn't think I'd see you tonight,” Zayn commented after a while. “I thought you'd be going at it with Styles by now.” 

“Niall told you, didn't he?"

Zayn chuckled. "It's nothing new."

“Yeah, well.”

“Well?” 

“He's annoying.” 

“What did you do?” 

“What did _I_ do?" Louis squawked loudly, causing people to turn around and tune in to their conversation. “What did _he_ do!”

“You don't need a man to be happy, Tomlinson!” One of his teammates, Calvin, offered. The surrounding group cheered him on. _Oh_ _god._ “You're perfect just the way you are.”

“Ditto.” Louis lifted an invisible drink for a toast. Although he was touched by his supportive audience and personal hype man, he still glared as Zayn shook with laughter. 

“It's the same routine every single time, man.” 

Louis stared off into the distance and agreed, yeah, nothing seemed to ever change. 

_Just tired of this._

Louis was tired too. One moment Harry was possessive and all over him and the next he was throwing a tantrum and pretending Louis was at fault for everything. It's an old fucking routine. Maybe Louis had a hand in instigating it more than half the time, but that was beside the point. 

“Have you seen Aiden Grimshaw?” he asked abruptly, hoping mischief didn’t color his tone. “Tall. Brown hair. Nice smile. Kind of talks too much.”

“That's not what I meant.”

“You don't even know what I'm planning." A pause. "That’s not a confession that I’m planning something.” 

Zayn shook his head. “I know you, so it must not be good.”

Louis stole the spliff from his fingers and took a hit before returning it. He waved off his best friend's concerns and wound his way around several individuals. After a couple of minutes, and because Louis had never pretended to be anything but impatient, he wondered if Aiden had already gone home. He probably lost interest after seeing Louis slink away with Harry. _Ugh_. Just as he was about to make his way back to Zayn, a hand reached out for him. 

Louis met Aiden's eyes. 

“Just wanted to say I'm sorry for bothering you earlier. I didn't know about you and Styles. I think he’s cool. So yeah.” 

“I’m not with him,” Louis admitted.

“You're not?”

“There’s nothing. Literally nothing.” Louis winced internally but no one would tell. 

“Oh. Good. Great, yeah,” Aiden stammered out and while it was mildly adorable, it was mostly embarrassing. Aiden seemed a little unsure of himself and while it was sort of endearing, it wasn't very attractive in Louis’ opinion. 

Louis was about to search for something else to talk about, hopefully to pull a subject from thin air, when he caught a glimpse of Harry talking to Nick again. This time they were standing in a corner, their eyes intent on each other with a serious conversation in the midst. Nick’s hand came up to pat Harry’s shoulder. 

Aiden glanced in their direction as well and made a sound of relief. “There he is.”

“Harry?”

“No, my cousin.”

“Nick?”

Aiden looked back at him. “Yup! You didn’t know? I mentioned him earlier.” 

“Oh, I didn't make that connection." (More like he hadn’t paid an ounce of attention.) “I probably should have known by the last name.”

“He just got offered a job on campus,” Aiden continued as if Louis asked. “He studied journalism when he attended so he interned at the school radio his senior year. It's been a few years but the position recently opened up and he says he really liked it back then. Actually, if you want to join him over there, I'm down.” 

Louis was as willing to go over there as a bear stepping into a bear trap. “I'm fine right here,” Louis lied through his teeth, although he preferred this company a hundred times more. He had no interest in befriending Nick.

Aiden shrugged and dropped the subject.

Louis discreetly watched Nick lean a little too close to Harry. He had a feeling that was going to be a problem but refused to let it get to him. Somewhere in Louis' mind, the recipe for silencing his thoughts was to dance with Aiden when a raunchy song started playing.

He didn't pay Harry any mind the rest of the night but he could feel watchful eyes on them.

~~~

“Well, that was quite the night,” Zayn commented the next day, turkey sandwich in hand and a small book in the other. 

Louis threw a Hot Cheeto at him, which ended up in Zayn’s mouth and defeated the purpose of the attack. 

They occupied their favorite spot in the library. The seats were more cushioned and the AC wasn't cranked at an absurd low. The third floor was nearly deserted and Louis found some comfort in that. Mondays were meant for studying and that's what he was trying to do despite Zayn's attempts at getting him to talk. 

“Is Aiden your new...?” he prompted.

“I didn't know you were this invested in my sex life. You never cared before.” Louis smirked. “Liam has changed you.” 

Zayn nearly dropped his book, which served him right. 

“This isn’t about him,” he pointed out. 

“Oh, so it's okay for you to joke about my conquests but the moment I mention yours—”

“He’s not a conquest!”

“How’s it going, guys?” Niall dropped into the seat at the end of their table and slouched. His sunglasses were still on. “Must I remind you two about library etiquette?" He reached for Louis' bag of chips and out of habit, Louis tilted the opening in his direction. Niall focused on Zayn. "Who's your conquest?”

Zayn glared at Louis and Louis glared right back. 

“Ask Louis about his.”

“ _Louis_ is trying to do his homework. Speaking of which, Horan, are you here to do homework or are you here to see our pretty faces?” 

Munching first and shrugging next, Niall said, “I guess I'm here for your pretty faces. Already did my homework.”

Louis and Zayn stared at him like he’d decided to go streaking in public.

“Liam tricked me into doing it this morning." At the mention of Liam's name, Zayn sat up. Louis bit back a smirk. “He took the same class last semester so he showed me some resources that helped him and after I got started, I got carried away. I was done before I knew it.”

“What a thoughtful, young man. Don’t you agree, dear?" Louis reclaimed his Hot Cheetos, much to Niall's chagrin.

Zayn narrowed his eyes. 

“You guys are weird,” Niall said, checking his phone. “Anyways, how about a friendly match in the park later? Calvin just texted.”

Louis checked his phone. He had an unread text from Harry, which he ignored. “Why didn't he text me?" 

“Does it matter?"

~~~

When Louis agreed to an evening of soccer with the guys, he never expected that Harry would join them with his tiny, blue shorts, white, long-sleeve and salmon-colored beanie. He was a terrible player so Louis was unsure as to why he showed up and wondered who invited him. He suspected Niall. Louis would make sure to invite all of Niall’s exes to future gatherings to see how he’d cope with it. 

Zayn stood in a goalie post because he couldn’t be bothered to prance around a field, like he said when Louis tried convincing him to join the Sunday league. Zayn seemed flustered as he watched a sweaty, shirtless Liam bound towards him with the ball. Louis would have run after Liam to steal it but Harry was already on his tail and Louis would be damned if he went anywhere near those Bambi legs. 

Harry was a liability on the field. 

Liam effortlessly scored a goal to the left when Zayn dived to the right. He couldn’t be blamed, though, because even Louis was distracted by the view. He was certain that Zayn was closer to drooling than blocking an actual goal. 

Harry made his way back to center field. He was on Louis’ team, unfortunately, so his efforts in running after Liam like a chicken with its head cut off had been in vain. He looked in Louis’ direction and smiled. A nice smile if Louis were charmed but he wasn't so he stuck his tongue out. Harry lifted his hand to wave. Before Louis could decide whether to wave back or not, he heard someone yell from behind.

“What was that, Styles?!”

Louis looked over his shoulder just as Nick Grimshaw approached the sidelines. He was grinning and shouting some other comment that didn’t quite process in Louis’ mind. It sounded like an inside joke. Louis decided to ignore them because he was actually there to play a serious game and not socialize. What he hadn’t realized was that Nick wasn't alone. Two hands covered Louis' eyes, causing him to stumble since he’d been mid step. 

“Guess who?”

Aiden. Louis sighed internally.

“I’m in the middle of a game,” he huffed. 

“People are taking a water break.”

“Did you come here to referee?”

“I came with Nick. My cousin? Harry invited him and I tagged along.”

He uncovered Louis’ eyes and spun him around by the shoulders. He didn't remove his hands.

Louis pasted on a polite smile. “Nice. And did anyone tell Harry that he himself wasn’t invited?”

Although he looked a bit taken aback, Aiden let out an obnoxious laugh. Louis joined him for about two seconds when a ball hit his shin and startled them apart. He looked over at Harry who was closer than he’d been when the Grimshaws arrived.

“Game’s still on,” he called out like it was a reasonable explanation for hitting Louis with the ball.

Narrowing his eyes, Louis kicked the ball and watched it fly past Harry’s head, narrowly missing him. It had been Louis’ intention. He had good control of his kicks and awesome scare tactics, okay? Harry didn’t seem to find it amusing.

“I should probably get off the field,” Aiden admitted. He looked warily at where Harry was staring them down. 

“Don’t pay him any mind.”

“Okay…” Aiden was still looking at Harry who was now making his way over to them. 

Louis grasped the collar of Aiden's shirt without thinking and tugged him close so that he could plant a smacking kiss on his cheek. Aiden looked rather pleased and the wariness from before melted away. Harry stopped in his tracks and as he made a disgusted face at them, he was distracted from the ball that was kicked in his direction, hitting him square in the crotch. Niall actually had good aim, color Louis impressed.

~~~

Zayn walked into their tiny kitchen in search of an apple. “What happened to Styles was pretty fucked up. But also funny.”

“I’m watching something,” Louis informed him from the breakfast bar. He raised the volume on his laptop and proceeded to ignore Zayn's impending lecture. Lately it was, “why are you so mean to Styles?” and “maybe you should be nicer,” et cetera, et cetera. Louis recalled a time when Zayn didn’t question his mood swings. Also, Niall was the one who kicked that ball. Louis was merely a bystander.

“I saw him limping after the game,” Zayn pointed out. He washed a green apple and sank his teeth into it. “And you just ran off."

“That was from him trying to run around like a gazelle. He must have stepped wrong.”

“Pretty sure I saw Liam getting him some ice for his crotch.”

Louis kept his eyes on the screen. “Did he ice it for him too?"

“Not funny." Zayn offered him a bite but Louis politely declined. “I honestly don’t understand what happened between you two. Everything seemed perfect and one day it just... stopped.”

_Just tired of this._

“Nothing is ever perfect, Malik. You know what he did. Now can you please let me watch my show?” 

“You’ve seen ‘One Tree Hill’ like fifty times.”

“So? Watch it with me.” 

Zayn dropped his case for the time being. He didn’t typically get involved with Louis’ personal drama. It was a growing concern. Louis angled his laptop so they could both watch and Zayn could pretend like he wasn’t charmed by Chad Michael Murray’s face.

Not even five minutes later, Zayn proceeded to agitate Louis.

“Why are you still sleeping with him?” 

Louis huffed. “We fuck. It’s not that serious.” 

“And then you cuddle and go back to fighting the next day.”

“There is absolutely no cuddling involved. I don't know where you get your information to make such claims.”

Zayn stared him down so Louis decided to end their streaming party.

~~~

Saturday started off like a nice day. Birds chirped just outside his window, his face felt moisturized and fresh, his overall mood was light and calm. He stretched and turned over, screeching when he pressed up to a warm, solid body. He sputtered where his mouth met a tousle of brown curls.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

Harry rolled away until he was close to falling off the bed, his muscular back exposed. The curls at the nape of his neck looked soft.

“Harry." 

No sound.

“Harry. Styles.” 

“Go back to sleep.”

Louis shoved at him but he didn’t budge. 

“Last I checked, this isn't your dorm.”

“Last _I_ checked, you were sucking me off last night and tucking me in right after. Do you have amnesia?”

“I didn’t tell you to spend the night! Maybe you’re experiencing a mental block.” 

Harry mumbled something against his pillow.

“What?"

He lifted his head. “Are you worried Aiden will find out?”

Louis didn't deem that with a response, which was apparently the wrong thing to do because Harry suddenly shoved the bedspread off of himself and sat up. The movement was abrupt and made Louis wince. 

“Don’t pretend you weren't trying to make me jealous.” Harry’s voice suspiciously wavered on the last syllables. 

“I am not trying to do anything besides sleep peacefully. _Alone_.” He hit Harry with a pillow for emphasis.

“Then don’t cuddle me after making me come so that I don't have a choice but to fall asleep in your arms.”

“Get the fuck off my bed, Curly Fry! You speak nonsense!” 

“Fine,” Harry growled. He got up, glorious ass on display as he bent down to pick up his clothes. 

Louis launched a pillow at him. “Can’t believe you slept in the nude."

“I always do.” Harry hopped around as he shoved a pair of dark, skinny jeans on. “You know that.” 

“Shut up." He watched Harry shove a shirt on and make for the door. “Are you seriously going commando?” 

Harry winked on his way out. Louis stroked himself, praying Harry slipped out undetected.

"Oh hey, Zayn!" Harry's voice boomed in the distance.

Louis groaned, and not in a sexual way. 

~~~

His only lecture class this semester was really putting a toll on his patience. He didn’t know why his professor tortured them so much. It would’ve been less painful to hear nails scratch down the front of a chalkboard than to participate in pointless group discussions. Aiden and three others were grouped with him by the end of the class. He didn’t really know the other three. They exchanged numbers and started a group chat in order to meet for a project that was sprung on them during the last five minutes of class. 

He walked out with Aiden trailing behind him like a lost puppy. Louis hoped he’d get the hint and not follow him. He had a research paper for another class to write, which would probably require at least ten hours of his time. He was a thorough student. He wasn’t there for show or because his family could afford tuition like it was just an added cost. Louis was on yet another scholarship and he wasn't going to waste his time half-assing his Master's program. 

There was a small crowd gathered just outside the lecture hall. Louis was ready to shove his way through and hoped he’d lose his company in the process. There was a beautiful voice crooning a mellow song with a guitar accompanying it. He rolled his eyes. Who else would show off like that? He found a way to slip through the crowd without being spotted by the cause of the madness. 

To his dismay, Aiden was able to stay on his tail and reappeared beside him like it was a normal thing for him to do. Usually, Louis hightailed it out of that class successfully. He cursed Harry and his very existence for creating a road block. Fuck his guitar, too.

“That guy is so good! I didn’t get to see his face, though. We should have stuck around for the performance.”

 _Dear God_. If only Louis could plug his ears or teleport or turn invisible.

“You should have stayed. I have a lot of stuff to do, so I don’t really have time to hang around.”

“Oh,” Aiden paused. “That sucks. I was hoping you’d want to hang out. Maybe get some food? Or get started on our project?”

“Maybe some other time.” As an afterthought, he added, “Sorry.” He could be nice.

“Okay, but I’ll hold you to it.”

Without permission, Aiden kissed him on the cheek. Granted Louis had done the same thing the other day but he was pretty sure there was no point to any of this. He’d have to put a stop to it soon.

It sounded like Harry's strumming faltered momentarily but picked back up like nothing happened. 

~~~

When he emerged from the vigorous hours of report writing, Louis found that night had already settled around him. He closed his laptop and stretched for at least three minutes. It felt good to be done. Midterms were quickly approaching and he was already feeling Senioritis threatening to slow him down. It would be nice to kick back and go with the flow for once but Louis cared about his grades and the busier he kept himself, the less likely his mind wandered to uncharted territory.

He found Zayn in the kitchen cooking up some stew, which was odd because Zayn wasn’t the type to make stew. Sure, he liked making a fry up now and then but to actually spend the hours required to make a good stew was completely out of character. 

Louis popped open a beer. “What’s up?”

“Huh?” Zayn didn’t look up. Instead he dumped a mound of chopped potatoes into the pot and watched the liquid bubble. Then he started peeling some carrots rather violently. Pieces of skin fell to the floor.

“Zayn?”

“What?” 

“Okay. What’s going on?" Louis set his beer down. “You’re scaring me.”

Zayn finally looked over and Louis kind of wished he hadn’t. Zayn chewed on his lower lip and his eyes welled up. Louis hadn’t seen him upset in a long time. Or ever. It was disheartening. 

“Put the vegetable peeler down, Malik.”

“Why?”

“So I can give you a cuddle.”

They embraced as long as Zayn allowed himself to be held before he was turning away to discreetly (but not so much) dab at his eyes and check on his pot. 

“Will you tell me why you’re crying?”

“I’m not crying.”

“No, of course not.”

Zayn sighed dramatically as he lowered the potency of the flame and covered the pot with a heavy lid, carrots abandoned on the counter. 

“I fucked up with Liam.”

Ah, Liam. The only person who could possibly draw such emotions from Zayn, who didn't typically allow things to get to him. He adopted the devil-may-care attitude in most situations like their dear friend, Niall. This was different. 

“What happened?”

“I don’t know, Lou. We were hanging out with Niall earlier." He lowered the flame a tad more. “We're at that stupid sports bar where the drinks are half off on Tuesdays. Everything is cool. We're joking about stuff, nothing important, and like...” Zayn trailed off. He glanced at Louis with his wet, honey-colored eyes. “Niall makes a joke about some guy staring at me from another table and like, the guy was definitely staring at me but I wasn’t fucking interested because Liam, y’know?”

Louis nodded, encouraging him to continue. Zayn had been harboring this crush on their friend for a couple of years and it was the most ridiculous thing to see this gorgeous, kind soul act so clueless when it came to love. Not that Louis had a leg to stand on.

“Next thing I know, that guy sends me a drink. Liam gets all weird and tells me I should go thank him and practically pushes me out of the booth.” He frowned as the scene probably unfolded again in his mind. “I get the dude’s number. Ask me if I remember his name. I see Liam getting up to leave and I panic so I…”

Louis waited for the punchline. Too many seconds passed. 

“What did you do?”

Zayn shook his head slowly. “I'm not thinking at this point. I walk up to him, grab him and lay one on him. Right there, in the middle of the bar. I can hear Niall cheering louder than the people watching the Dodger game on the screens.”

Louis’ chest swelled with pride. _Fucking finally_. “Yes! That’s good!” The look on his best friend’s face said otherwise. 

Zayn shook his head. He was no longer making eye contact as his chin was tucked against his chest and he stared resolutely at the floor. 

“That’s good, right?” 

“Instead of kissing me back like I hoped he would, he pushes me off and doesn't say anything. I watch him leave. Niall calls after him but he just fucking leaves.”

 _Shit_. That wasn't the reaction that Louis would have imagined. He'd played it up in his head. But how?

“Oh, babe. I’m so sorry.”

“I wasn’t even interested in that guy. He has to know that.”

All Louis could do was wrap his arms around Zayn’s slighter frame and mutter soothing words. 

Zayn muttered back against his shoulder. 

“Huh?”

“Can you talk to him?”

Zayn wasn’t the type to send a messenger. Louis wasn’t sure how he would even go about having that conversation with Liam. It was one thing to offer advice and a cuddle but to get involved and meddle... It didn't seem like a good idea.

“I’m not sure I should.”

“Aren’t you seeing him tonight?” 

Louis stepped back. “I don’t have plans with Liam tonight.”

Zayn rolled his eyes. “I’m talking about Styles, not Liam.”

Louis couldn’t help but laugh. “You had me there. But no. That is not a good idea.”

“Why not? They’re roommates so maybe Harry knows something.” 

“I don’t talk to Harry like that.”

“You literally spend every night with him.” 

“Not _every_ night!” Louis knew he was getting defensive but lately it felt as if he was being accused of things that weren’t _things_.

“This act is starting to get old, Lou. We both know what's really going on.”

Louis clenched his jaw.

“I shouldn't have asked.” He goes back to peeling the poor carrots. They probably should have been added to the pot already but what did Louis know about cooking stew. Harry would know.

“Hang on, okay? There has to be an explanation. There’s no way he would willingly reject you.”

Zayn sighed. “Maybe he's interested in someone else.” 

“Impossible. He gets shy and stares at your face when you're around. I'm also pretty sure he finds opportunities to show off his abs.”

His wistful frown deepened. "Then why didn't he kiss me back?”

Louis wanted to go back to the times when Zayn didn’t have an existential crisis over boys. Or rather, one boy. Louis figured he would have to help him in some way but it would have to be with the main source, not the enemy.

~~~ 

Luckily, Louis made zero effort to intervene because he spotted Liam on campus the very next day as he made his way towards the library. Convenient. Liam sported a cozy-looking cardigan and thick-rimmed glasses that were likely not prescribed. When he spotted Louis, the other boy paused and appeared to be a second away from splitting. At least guilt was written into his expression. Although he looked unsure of himself, he smiled at Louis.

“I’m not going to interrogate you,” Louis said, mildly offended. “So you can relax."

Liam released an odd sound. “I didn’t think you would."

“You were about to run."

“I just need some time. I don't really know what to say.” At least he had the decency to look ashamed. 

“I don't want to get involved but I think you should give him a chance to explain himself. Or at least apologize."

Liam frowned. He stood there, fish mouthing for a bit until Louis took pity on him. 

“Whatever is going on in that head of yours, I promise Zayn will not judge you for it. Talk to him when you’re ready, okay? He’s not going to bite.”

“I know. Thank you. You're a good friend."

Louis gave his shoulder a friendly pat and attempted to end their conversation there, he didn't want to overstep.

“I’ve got to go but uh, Lou?”

“Yes?”

“Don't take this the wrong way but I think you should follow your own advice. Harry won't bite.” And with that, he continued on his way.

Louis stood there feeling like someone dumped a bucket of ice-cold water over his head. What the hell was that supposed to mean? What the fuck!

The image of a curly-haired someone flashed behind his eyelids as he tried to blink the thoughts away. Why was everyone so obsessed with them? Harry was just a boy Louis got off with. They were sexually compatible. Why did it have to mean more than that?

~~~ 

Harry always kept a spare key to his and Liam's fancy apartment beneath a potted succulent because he was naïve like that. Louis slipped it into the keyhole and prayed Liam wasn’t home yet. He wasn’t prepared for another awkward encounter and he was still a little peeved for getting called out. Once inside, he found that Harry wasn’t home. His last class on Wednesdays ended at seven. He was usually home by half past. Not that Louis knew his schedule by memory. He sat on Harry’s bed and looked around the room. There were some pictures of Harry’s parents and sister on the vanity across from the bed. Staring back at him. Harry fucked him against it not so long ago. Louis had to flip the frames down so he wouldn’t feel guilty. Anna, Rob and Emma would have been his in-law’s by now.

He toed off his shoes and got comfortable. He even went as far as slipping on Harry’s lavender sweatshirt, which somehow kept ending up back in Harry’s possession. After half an hour, he started feeling impatience creep up on him so he decided to lay back and close his eyes for a moment. 

The next time he opened them, he squinted at the alarm clock on the nightstand. The fact that Harry still had a digital alarm clock was a bit endearing but he would never admit it. It was almost midnight. Louis frowned as he checked his phone and didn’t find any texts from ‘Curly Fry.’ He usually sent a, “You free?” or a, “Can I come over?” It was odd to not find anything. They normally would have already hooked up and might have been arguing over something or going at it once again. Wednesdays were a sure thing. So were Fridays. And Saturdays. When he thought about it, even Sundays and Mondays were part of their schedule. Were they really that needy? Did they really have to get off that often? Was it like that before? He didn’t like to dwell on those times so he shook himself out of that thought process and yawned into the sleeve of Harry’s sweatshirt. It smelled like vanilla. Louis sniffed it again.

Where was this boy? 

He considered slipping under the comforter and calling it a night when he heard the front door burst open. He thought he heard muffled giggles. He assumed it was Liam and Harry. They must have gone out. Louis appreciated being left out of their plans.

Footsteps approached the room. He didn’t sit up because he was lazy and why should he? Harry's bed was comfortable. Only seconds later, he found himself in the worst predicament possible when the bedroom door swung open and two figures appeared in the dark doorway, sucking face, judging by the sounds they made. Okay, then not Harry and Liam.

Harry and someone else. 

Louis let that sink in as he laid frozen.

Harry brought someone home. 

Someone else.

His heart sank and shattered into a million pieces and perhaps he should have seen it coming. It was bound to happen eventually.

 _Just tired of this_. 

Louis was stupid, stupid, stupid. Liam's words had gotten to him and that was why he'd waited for Harry so they could talk and possibly repair what was broken.

Now that idea was flung out the window.

Before they could reach the bed and discover him, Louis rolled off and stealthily landed on the carpet on his hands and feet, in a crouched position like a cat. He waited by the side of the bed and thanked his lucky stars he left his shoes on that side. They didn’t seem to notice him, caught up in the moment, so he grasped the backs of his shoes with one hand and army-crawled to the door as they toppled onto the bed like a pair of needy cavemen judging by the grunts. He wasn’t sure where that imagery came from but it was all he had to distract himself from dwelling on what was actually going on. Pressure built up in his chest. He didn’t look back when he made it to the doorway they left wide open, and managed to crawl out unseen and utterly heartbroken. 

He was certain it was Nick Grimshaw. Who else had shown eager interest in Harry recently? Who else could make noises like that? What did Harry see in that old man, anyway? Louis wiped angrily at his eyes and swore he wouldn’t wait to confirm his suspicions. He ran into the night like a thief until he was out of breath. He felt Harry’s spare key dig into his pocket. He’d have to return it at some point before the other noticed it was missing. Then he stopped and looked down at himself. Harry’s fucking sweatshirt. He’d also have to deal with the fact that he left one of his favorite band shirts behind when he changed into this one. Fucking hell. He really liked his Def Leppard shirt.

He sucked in a breath and thought about how much he needed his best friend.

~~~

To his dismay, Louis found Zayn’s bedroom door closed. That would mean he was already asleep. They had an open door policy. Sort of. Except for when Louis had sleepovers.

That was over now.

It was past one in the morning. There was no point in waking him up. He’d probably sleep right through Louis’ rant.

Louis removed Harry’s sweatshirt, curled up in bed and cradled it against his chest. He couldn’t shake the feeling of deja vu, once again feeling abandoned by the love of his life.

~~~

//2 Years Earlier//

“Please, Lou. Please, please, please.”

Louis closed his eyes and nodded his ascent. “Okay, okay. Let’s go.”

As Harry smiled brightly, his two front teeth looked exceptionally cute and his dimples made Louis' heart pound. He grabbed Louis’ hand and tugged him away from the exit that led them to the roof of a hotel. There was a helicopter waiting for them, the propellers causing their hair to move in every direction. They shaded their eyes from the force of the wind rushing around them. They were instructed to make their way over to the helicopter and climb aboard. Harry strapped himself in quickly and helped secure the straps of Louis' seatbelt. The pilot held a thumbs up and pointed at the radio flight helmet he wore. A co-pilot passed similar helmets over to them. Once secured over their heads, they could hear the pilot welcome them aboard and ask if they’d ever flown in a helicopter before. Harry’s stepfather had done that with him a couple of times when he was younger. Louis was new to it and he was terrified. He thought he was going to throw up. The pilot went over some instructions and let them know their ride would last a total of twenty-five minutes. 

Harry held his hand and squeezed it reassuringly. If Louis wasn’t so fucking gone for him, he’d have called it quits in the moment Harry revealed the surprise. But that would come later.

The co-pilot gave a quick countdown and soon they were up in the air. First 100 feet above the roof of the hotel and then 500 feet up and then 1,000 and at some point, Louis was no longer paying attention to the rise in elevation. He was afraid to open his eyes—couldn’t exactly recall when he’d closed them but he could feel his stomach fluttering and his teeth chattering. He was fucking terrified.

Harry coaxed him to open his eyes at some point. He pointed out a couple of landmarks and never released Louis' hand. The view was incredible; Louis could appreciate it even if he feared for his own life. It took a few minutes for Louis to allow himself to relax. Harry's excitement was contagious. Once he gave in, he fell in love with the rush he felt. High and in love.

They landed over a flat piece of land on a canyon, which had the perfect view of the Pacific Ocean. He realized there was more to the surprise when he spotted Harry’s Gibson and dozens of lit candles surrounding it. 

When they stumbled out of the helicopter, Harry’s hands on his hips, Louis shoved at him playfully. “Styles, are you sacrificing me to the guitar Gods? What is this?”

Harry snorted. “This is for you, Lou. C’mon.” 

He led them to the scene. The sun was setting, drawing pinks and purples in its wake. There was a picnic blanket on the ground with a basket in the center, a bottle of wine peeking out of it. Harry gestured for Louis to take a seat and he sat across from him with the guitar in his lap. 

“Darling, what’s going on? This is…” Louis took a deep breath. It felt like a dream sequence beginning from their takeoff and ending with this romantic setting. He’d already gone through a roller coaster of feelings and he was still trying to catch his breath. “A lot.”

Harry looked at him openly and honestly. He began to strum a steady beat and with his regular, slow-paced speaking voice, he said, “Baby, you have no idea how nervous I am right now. Excited but very, very nervous. You make me feel so much.” He swallowed visibly and broke out into song. As usual, Louis was hypnotized when Harry performed privately for him, and he couldn’t look away. Harry’s dimples made several appearances and his eyes remained on Louis’. A breeze rustled his hair and some of it got into his eyes. Louis leaned over to tuck the strands behind his ears. Harry never stopped playing. Never took his eyes off Louis.

Words were sung about stars and “look at us now” and Louis’ personal favorite lines from the chorus:

_It’s time to start living_

_And open our eyes;_

_Open our eyes_

After a few minutes, Harry finished playing, clearing his throat and patting his pockets until he retrieved a golden band. His hands were shaking but he looked determined. He set his guitar aside and scoot closer to Louis. 

Louis shook his head. “Babe...”

He reached for Louis’ left hand. “Lou?”

Shaking his head more persistently, Louis shuffled backwards.

Harry dropped his hand, eyes already shiny. 

“Harry, I’m sorry.”

And that was the moment Louis ruined everything. 

He held his ground and didn’t cry until he was back on the helicopter, which was one hell of a ride back. Harry insisted he had already paid for it so there was no point in letting it go to waste. Harry’s family and Louis’ family revealed themselves from behind some bushes and set about collecting the candles and picnic items while Louis waited with the pilots. He couldn’t face their families so Harry dealt with them. For a second, he almost thought Harry wouldn’t join him on the ride back but he did and when he climbed on, he went through the motions of buckling his seat belt and checking that Louis’ straps were fastened properly, all without making eye contact. They didn’t speak but they held hands. Harry knew he needed it.

When they landed, Harry basically jumped out and helped Louis step down. His hands slipped away as soon as Louis gained his footing and the next thing he knew, they were driving home in more silence. Louis watched Harry collect his things from his dorm and he sat still, hoping Harry wouldn’t notice his lavender sweatshirt was missing. It was hidden beneath Louis’ pillow. He stowed it away when Harry collected his toiletries from the bathroom. He would fight tooth and nail for it. 

Watching him walk away had been the hardest thing Louis had ever gone through. He didn’t want them to end things. That wasn’t what he wanted when he told Harry they were too young to get engaged. That he still wanted to finish school and start his career and make sure he could support the lifestyle Harry was accustomed to. That he needed time to think. That he loved him with his whole heart, his whole being, but that didn’t mean marriage was a priority at the time. 

Harry didn’t argue. He listened with tears rolling down his sad, handsome face. The ring was out of sight by the time Louis finished his big speech. For all he knew, Harry would throw it off the cliff the moment Louis turned away. Apparently, their families had grown restless. They couldn’t hear what was being said but given that the reaction they were expecting hadn’t occurred yet, they clued in that Louis rejected the proposal. It was a huge shock to everyone.

It was not a mutual breakup. Harry took that decision upon himself and he took Louis’ heart with it. Louis slept in Harry's sweatshirt every night for about two weeks after Harry left him. They didn’t speak for several months and did their best to avoid each other at school. Their friends were confused and almost as heartbroken as they were. Their families were disappointed but still kept in touch. Louis regularly asked his mom for updates on Harry's stepfather, Rob's, health whenever he got the chance. He never stopped caring. 

~~~

//1.5 Years Earlier//

Upon starting grad school, Louis found that there was no escaping one very present Harry Styles. Although they hadn’t spoken in a long time, Harry was always just there. If there was a guy’s night out, there he was, sitting in the seat furthest away from Louis. School event? He was somewhere in the crowd with other friends that weren’t Louis’. Random hallway on campus? There he was with his stupid guitar case slung over one shoulder. Holiday shopping time? He could count on Harry to shop at the same fucking department store on the same fucking evening. 

They orbited each other. Louis hated it. That was, until he confronted Harry at yet another party where he just could not find it in him to meet someone new, hook up with them and move on. Surely not with Harry’s ever lingering presence, watching from a distance with calculating looks and a peeved expression. So one night, and Louis would forever blame this on the alcohol he’d swallowed, he cornered his ex and demanded for some type of change. Perhaps they could select different custody days with their friends or take turns instead of attending the same parties. Maybe one of them should transfer schools. That one was a bit extreme, even for Louis. 

The point was that Louis devised a plan to actually talk. They were mature adults. 

Harry mistook the ambush for something else and within seconds they were stumbling into an empty bathroom and kissing for the first time since their split with biting remarks and unkind touches until it turned into gentle sweeps of their lips and soft, wandering hands. As much as Louis loathed to admit it, he knew he would never find that with anyone else. Harry made him feel good. Louis returned the favor.

Then it started happening often.

The first night Harry stayed over, he found his lavender sweatshirt in Louis’ closet and he looked like he wanted to comment on it, judging by the sadness that overtook his face. His eyes sparkled with unshed tears. Louis shut it down immediately. He made Harry swear to never speak of it—what led them to that point and how they constantly found themselves consumed by each other. Louis assumed it had an expiration date, the kissing and the fucking and the spooning. They never talked about it and everything turned into an argument, which in turn led to one of them on their knees or Harry’s come in his ass. 

They didn’t clue their friends in but Zayn and Liam weren’t born yesterday, as Zayn had kindly pointed out, and they soon realized what the pair were engaging in. Niall hardly ever commented on it but it was pretty clear he was cheering them on.

Least of all, Louis didn’t want their families to know. They would only get their hopes up for a real reconciliation. And that was the thing—this wasn’t a reconciliation of any kind. In fact, they could hardly stand each other.

Nevertheless, nothing was better than the sex and neither one of them was willing to let that go just yet.

~~~

With a broken heart in his chest, Louis worked on his group project because that seemed like the only efficient distraction. They divided the workload but Louis found it hard to concentrate on his portion. Flashbacks from the night before flooded his mind. Had Nick slept over? Did he hold Harry like Louis held him? Or better?

The only solution he could think of was to call up Aiden and invite him over to work on their project together. He would have preferred to meet up somewhere on campus but just imagining running into Harry resulted in another ten minutes of silent crying. 

At least the project and Aiden's company would help keep him out of his own head. 

While Louis waited for his classmate, he wondered where Zayn had spent the night. He had yet to see or hear from him. The worry grew. He’d have to find out later because there was a knock on the door. Louis let out a long-suffering sigh before opening the door to reveal Harry in a jogging outfit and snapback placed backwards. He looked hot and tired, sleep deprived even. _God_ , Louis was not prepared to see him so soon! What would he say? Was Harry there to turn the pieces of his heart into dust? Was he ending their arrangement officially since he was so good at doing that?

“Can I help you?” Louis didn't mean for his voice to sound so rough but it was hard to act unaffected.

Harry’s face twisted. He opened his mouth and a yawn superseded. 

“Listen, I’m busy and you seem exhausted. This isn’t a good time.” Louis swung the door shut but one of Harry’s neon Nike’s slipped in to keep it ajar. 

“Can we talk? I need to tell you something.”

 _No_. _Absolutely not_. Louis would rather listen to Aiden talk about his family’s fabulous winter vacation plans whilst sober. He’d rather let one of their yachts run him over. Anything but this.

“I’m expecting someone.”

“Oh.” Harry’s brows scrunched together, forming a deep line in between them. Back then, Louis would have smoothed it out with a delicate thumb. “What is a good time for you, then?”

Louis snorted. “Never, if possible.”

“God, Louis, you’re so fucking insufferable sometimes.”

“Then go away! Problem solved!”

Harry wilted like a flower.

“Hey, guys. Is this a bad time?” Aiden appeared out of thin air. Impeccable timing. Harry backed away from the door, eyes flickering from Louis and back to Aiden who stood confidently to his right. His backpack hung from one arm, looking awfully confident unlike other times. 

“Aiden, you're just in time. Come in.” Louis opened the door to allow him to slip through. Harry tried to follow but Louis blocked his attempt. “Where do you think you’re going?”

Harry huffed, his frown deepening. “You don’t think I’m leaving you alone with him, do you?”

“You have no right to do that, Curly Fry.”

“Okay, then can you tell me why he’s here?”

Louis shoved at his chest. “Don’t worry about it. Go find Nick. I’m sure he’d love to entertain you.” And with that, Louis slammed the door in his face, pretending to not hear Harry pound on it with his knuckles. He’d give up eventually. 

Aiden’s face was comical. He probably wanted to ask a load of questions but one look from Louis kept them at bay. They got straight to the point and worked on their project and shared updates with the rest of their group. Harry resorted to calling and texting Louis. Each attempt was ignored. Thankfully, Aiden kept his mouth shut. Louis might have stabbed him with a pen otherwise. 

Before leaving, Aiden asked him out. Again. Louis didn’t make any promises. It apparently involved the Grimshaw family holiday party and Louis could think of a hundred things he would rather do than to attend a stuffy rich people party.

~~~ 

In the late afternoon, there still was no sign of Zayn. Louis considered starting a search party. Especially after Zayn's phone went straight to voicemail a couple of times. What if something was wrong?

He thrust a spoon into a tub of mint chocolate chip ice cream when his phone went off. He practically dived for it. 

It was his mother. 

“Hi, mom. How are you, love?”

“Hi, hun. I’m…” she sighed. “Okay. I’m okay. Have you spoken to Harry?”

Louis gripped his phone tightly. “Why?” he asked cautiously.

“Oh, hun. You may need to console him.”

He was already slipping his Vans on and seeking his keys. “What happened? You’re scaring me.”

“It’s Robert. He was admitted in the ER. You should check on Harry. Please. And maybe you should come with him. Just in case.”

Louis managed to shove on a coat and a beanie before they ended the call, melting ice cream long forgotten. His mother texted him the address of the hospital and said she would wait for them there. It didn’t make sense. Harry’s stepfather had undergone a successful treatment. As far as Louis knew, Rob was a fighter. He was strong. He would be okay.

He tried to make sense of everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours. Harry not being home at the usual time but fumbling in the dark with a stranger later on? It didn’t make sense. Was that his way of coping with the heaviness of Rob’s condition? Is that why he showed up to talk to Louis? Fuck! Louis felt sick to his stomach. He’d been so mean. He'd looked into Harry's sad eyes and he'd been so hurtful. He didn’t deserve Harry’s forgiveness but he would sure beg for it. 

In record time, he made it to Harry’s apartment and banged on the door. Zayn opened it, disgruntled and decked in a navy blue robe that definitely did not belong to him, an obvious hickey at the base of his throat and his signature quiff in disarray. His cheeks reddened when he registered Louis in front of him. 

With a small, sheepish grin, Zayn said, “Hey, Lou.”

Louis couldn’t believe the betrayal. The audacity. The shattering of his heart once again! At this point, it would be irreparable. Zayn's absence made sense now. It was difficult to believe. Zayn wouldn’t. Harry wouldn’t.

Would they?

“Hey Lou? HEY LOU?” Louis would punch him if he had it in him and then he would knee Harry in the balls and then he would never talk to either one of them again. That was the plan. He’d even recruit Liam to help. Fuck. Did Liam know? Was that why he acted so coldly when Zayn kissed him? Had this been going on behind Louis’ back for a while? Is that why Liam wanted Louis to talk to Harry?

The sickness he felt when he heard the news about Rob threatened to make a comeback. 

“What are you doing here, Malik? Why didn’t you answer your fucking phone? I was fucking worried!”

Zayn reached a hand out but Louis jumped back.

“I turned off my phone. I was kind of busy. I’m sorry, bro.”

“I can’t believe this, _bro_. Fuck you. Don't fucking call me.”

People claimed Louis had a flare for drama and damn them if they weren’t right. He stormed away, hoping Zayn felt as bad as Louis felt. He’d deal with him later. His mother made it clear that Rob was in critical condition. There was no way he’d miss seeing him even though he knew everything would turn out right. He really, really hoped. 

~~~

//7 Years Earlier//

At fifteen, Harry basically had his life figured out. He told Louis he knew what he wanted to do after high school and where he pictured himself heading. He knew before Louis himself, who at the time was seventeen and would soon send off an application for the state university of his choice. Harry coincidentally planned to attend the same school. They had been inseparable ever since middle school. It wasn’t surprising that he’d included Louis in the blueprint of his future. 

Their mothers worked in the same medical office and Harry’s stepfather was Louis’ boss. 

His first job was at a high-end shoe store, which Rob owned. He was a great boss and he taught Louis a lot about business and financials. The store stood well on its own and Louis made good commission. He saved it up. He wanted to do nice things for Harry because throughout the years of their friendship, Harry had it easier and he treated Louis to the nicest things and invited him to the nicest places. Louis always felt guilty and wanted to repay him in some way. 

He also wanted to change the nature of their relationship. The past year brought with it many situations such as heavy glances, innocent hand holding and awkward boners during sleepovers. Louis felt like he’d always had a crush on Harry. It became prominent in his senior year. Harry was just so lovely and so kind. He already owned Louis’ heart. 

Louis wanted to make sure he wasn’t imagining it.

On a Friday, Louis felt brave enough to ask Rob for an earlier shift on Saturday. His boss, without question, changed his schedule to accommodate the request. With a shit-eating grin, Louis thanked him profusely. Then he rushed out and called Harry.

“Go on a date with me?”

“Lou, what?"

“Tomorrow night.”

“Don’t you work?”

“I switched my shift. So what do you say, Harry?”

He waited with bated breath. He felt someone’s presence behind him but he didn’t pay them any mind. He just wanted Harry to say yes and put him out of his misery.

“Thought you’d never ask,” Harry said, sounding pleased. Louis felt it too.

“See you tomorrow, darling.”

“I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop,” said a voice from behind. "Can I say I'm relieved that's who you were asking time off for?"

Louis jumped. He'd just ended the call.

“You heard. Sorry.” Louis’ cheeks warmed. Like the Eminem rap, his palms were sweaty. _Knees weak, arms are heavy._

“There’s no better candidate for Harry than you, Tomlinson. I hope you always remember that.”

Louis was touched. He'd been nervous. He wasn't exactly in the closet but he'd been afraid of how his actions would be perceived.

“It’s him, Rob. He’s the special one.”

From that day on, Rob wholeheartedly supported their relationship. Harry’s mother might have questioned it for half a minute when it was Louis who showed up on their doorstep to whisk away their son. She was concerned about the slight age difference. Rob must have said something because she practically handed over her son and asked Louis to take care of him. 

Louis planned on it.

~~~

The hospital was near their hometown but still three hours away from school. Louis drove without noting the time and distance. He did a crappy job of parking his Toyota and raced to the ER. He ran into one of his sisters, thankfully, since she already knew her way around.

Harry’s family, along with Louis' own, took up a lot of real estate in the waiting room. Only Harry was missing. 

Louis’ mom greeted him with a big hug and Anna, Harry’s lovely mother, gave him an even bigger hug. They hadn’t seen each other since the days leading up to the disaster proposal. He’d seen her from a distance when he climbed onto the helicopter. The last image he had of her was when she consoled Harry with a hug. Louis had forced himself to look away.

She didn’t seem to harbor the resentment Louis expected. He thought about it during the drive and prepared himself. Apparently it hadn’t been necessary. Anna was kind, like Harry, and didn't seem to wield any bitterness towards Louis.

“Harry?” he asked, throat tight.

“He was here yesterday and left early this morning. He said he would come back with you. I’m guessing you came alone?”

An out of body experience was something Louis had only read about in fiction or seen in over-dramatized movie moments. It was possible that he finally knew what it was like. He could hear the sounds of his sisters and Harry’s cousins chattering away and he registered Harry’s sister making her way over with her arms outstretched. He just couldn’t move. 

“Louis?” Anna questioned.

“Louis!” Emma exclaimed into his ear as she wrapped him in a hug. 

Everyone was treating him like he hadn’t broken Harry’s heart two years ago. Or like he wasn’t constantly breaking his heart in the aftermath—reeling him in all the time to only push him away again. These wonderful people should dislike him. He’d expected that much. He was wrong.

 _Fuck_ , was he wrong. 

If they knew what he’d practically accused Harry of doing, even if it had been mentally, they wouldn't be so kind. Would they? 

A doctor strolled into the room and delivered the news everyone hoped for. They all embraced and cheered. Rob would need time to recover but he was no longer in critical condition. The worst part was over. With extra care, he would be okay. The ambience in the room became lighter. Louis smiled and wiped away a couple of tears out of relief. 

Someone rushed in and several people talked over each other to share the extraordinary news. The newcomer was Harry. He was teary eyed but his smile was blinding. His face was pale and lips a deep red. A cute beanie covered his curls. Louis loved him. Never stopped.

From across the room, Harry spotted him like he'd felt his presence. He left his grandparents and went straight for Louis. 

Without preamble, he enveloped Louis’ body with his own. Louis felt Harry’s heart beating rapidly against his chest. He brought the cold in with him. Louis would like nothing more than to snuggle him under a bundle of fuzzy blankets to keep him warm and safe.

“Thanks for being here,” Harry whispered.

Louis looked over Harry’s shoulder and made eye contact with Emma who was watching them with a hopeful smile. She wasn’t the only one. It seemed they were the focus of the room. This probably wasn’t the time or place for a reconciliation. If Harry would have him. However, Louis thought it was nice to know that some of the people he cared most about weren’t waving pitchforks at him.

“I’m still mad at you for being a dick,” Harry added. “But I’m glad you’re here. Rob will be happy to see you.” He burrowed his face into Louis’ neck, his nose cold and wet. 

Louis didn’t mind. He smoothed his hands up and down Harry’s back hoping to warm him up. 

Harry pulled back just enough to look him in the eyes. Emotions whirled behind his beautiful eyes. “Can we finally have that talk you’ve been avoiding? Please?”

“I’m sorry,” Louis whispered. His bottom lip wobbled. “For a lot of things.”

“Not here, baby.” Harry hugged him some more and Louis sank into it. 

With Harry, he was always sinking.

~~~

Louis learned that Harry’s car broke down on his way over. He had it towed to a shop and was told it would take a couple of days. The process had taken longer than Harry would have liked. He didn’t feel comfortable calling someone for a ride so he took an Uber to the hospital. Louis could imagine the high cost of the ride. Sometimes it just didn’t matter.

Louis drove them back after several rounds of saying goodbye to their families, including a weak smiling Rob. They promised to FaceTime soon and to visit over the weekend. Harry resembled serenity as he sat back in the passenger seat like he belonged there. He reached over at random to caress Louis’ arm or to squeeze his thigh. It felt like old times. When things were good. Perfect, even.

Hope blossomed in Louis’ chest. The love he had for his boy was insurmountable—greater than life. He was the only one Louis ever wanted in every remote way possible. He wanted to be touched, held and loved by him. They could only be so lucky to gain what they once had. If Harry could find it in himself to look past the amount of hurt Louis had caused, then perhaps they could start repairing their broken hearts.

Two-thirds of the way was enough for Louis to go without itching to have the talk Harry asked for. He exited the freeway and pulled into a Wendy’s drive-thru, ordering Harry’s meal without asking. Harry watched him with a soft smile on his lips. Louis’ heart was tender. They settled in a secluded corner of the parking lot and ate their chicken sandwiches with minimal small talk. 

After his last bite, Louis cleared his throat. “I’m not sure where to start,” he admitted after much deliberation. “There’s so much to say yet I’m drawing a blank.”

Harry took a swig of his unsweetened iced tea and set the cup down to take Louis’ hand in his.

“Can I start? Is that alright?”

Louis nodded his acquiescence.

“I haven’t exactly hated what we’ve been doing the past year or so. It probably hasn’t been healthy and I’ve definitely felt like shit immediately afterwards on come occasions but that was because I was scared that as soon as we stopped, you’d move on and I’d lose you completely. And I don’t mean moving on like with another person, I just mean in general. You’re almost done with grad school. I’ll get my Bachelor’s in the Spring and you’ll get your dream job. Then what? I really don’t know.”

Frowning, Louis turned his hand over so that their palms could press together. “You’ve always had it all worked out. I thought you wanted to get your Master’s too.”

“I did. I mean, I do...” Harry took a deep breath and exhaled like how he practiced with yoga. “I’m also thinking of taking a gap year to figure out what I really want to do.”

“Oh. That’s—” Louis struggled to find the right words. It was the first time he was hearing about those plans. “That sounds great.”

“Yeah? Even if I’m gone for a year?”

What was that sound? Crunching glass? His heart coming to a halt?

“It’s your call, babe.”

“I’ve missed that. All you ever call me lately is ‘Curly Fry’ and while it’s charming, I know you can do a million times better.”

“Darling, you have no idea how much I’ve held back.”

“Yeah?” Harry’s eyes swam in unshed tears.

“We’ll come back to that topic but can I say something now?”

“Of course.” Harry sat up and focused all of his attention on Louis. He dabbed at the corners of his eyes.

“I’m sorry about this morning.” He glanced at the time on the dashboard. “Well, yesterday, I jumped to conclusions and I lashed out.”

“What were you upset about?”

“Don’t get mad, okay?”

“Did Aiden do something?”

“No, so stop making that face.”

Harry looked relieved. 

“I thought you slept with someone else. With Nick, to be precise.”

“You what?!” He dropped Louis’ hand like he’d been burned. “You think I would do that to you,” he stated instead of asking.

Louis shook his head. “It was an abstract idea that you would eventually get tired of dealing with my shit and find someone else.”

“I hope you don’t actually believe that.”

“I was waiting for you in your room. Wednesday evening. You never came so I took a nap. A little after I woke up, two people showed up to your room and in the darkness, I thought it was you and assumed the other was Nick. They were making out. I barely had time to slip out of the room unseen.”

Harry made a funny face, completely vexed. “Why would you think—wait, who was it? I wasn’t even in town!”

“I know that, babe. Your mom told me you spent the night back home and I put two and two together. I’m so sorry! I thought you were hooking up with Nick.”

“Louis, I’m not interested in him. It’s not like that. We’re friends. He’s actually been trying to convince me to intern at the campus radio station because he works there. I told him that’s not really the direction I want to go in.”

“I’m an idiot.” Louis let go of his hand and gripped the steering wheel, dropping his forehead to the top of the wheel. “Such an idiot.”

“Hey, no. I get it. That was my room after all, which, what the actual hell? Was it Liam?”

Louis lifted his head. “Liam? I didn’t consider that...”

“Maybe he got the wrong room because he was err... distracted.”

“That makes sense. Oh, fuck! Do you think he was hooking up with Zayn?”

“Zayn?! Malik?”

“Yeah, yeah. It’s starting to make sense.” Louis laughed. “So after I yelled at you at my place, y’know, when Aiden arrived—”

“Yeah, loved that,” Harry said dryly. 

“I’m sorry.” Louis smoothed a hand over his shoulder. “I promise nothing happened. I invited him over so we could work on a project.” Understanding filled Harry’s eyes. “I needed a distraction after the night I spent. I mean, I thought you’d fucked someone else and Zayn was nowhere to be found…”

“So you think it was him for sure?”

“Maybe? I mean, I fucking hope so. He’s been half in love with Liam for a long time.”

Harry smiled like a cat who trapped a mouse. 

“What?”

“I’ll tell you after. Keep going.”

“Weirdo.” Louis hoped he didn’t sound too fond. He still had a reputation to keep. “After Aiden left, my mom called and she told me about Rob. My first thought was to go find you and apologize for being a piece of shit.” He smoothed out Harry’s frown lines as he continued with, “Guess who answered the door? Zayn! In a bathrobe! It was obvious he’d had a good night. I had been worried that he didn’t sleep at home but he’d been having a good time all along.”

“This is amazing,” Harry intoned. He looked happy. Louis was about to ruin that.

“Harry, I thought he’d spent the night with you. I thought I’d been wrong about Nick.”

“Wow. That’s even worse.” Harry closed his eyes. “Why would you think that? I understand about the confusion because it was _my_ bedroom, but why would you think I’d do that to you?” His eyes opened wide. “And with your best friend? I would never.”

“Please don’t be mad,” Louis pleaded. “I know I was being unreasonable and I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions.”

“Do you know, though?” Harry tilted his chin. He glanced down at Louis’ lips. “Do you know that you’re still the love of my life?”

A dam burst. First his eyes watered, then they streamed down his face in what felt like slow motion. Harry’s hands cradled his face, thumbs wiping at his cheeks gently. Louis felt a wave of appeasement wash over all of the worries and fears he’s been harboring since they split up. All that time he’d been counting down to the day when Harry finally gave up on him.

“Baby, I love you. I need you to know that.” His thumbs continued to massage his face. It felt good. Everything about this moment felt good. “Even when I’m pissed at you for pushing my buttons and flirting with others guys just to mess with me. I love you when you’re yelling at me or pranking me or stealing my favorite sweatshirt.” He paused, giving Louis a pointed look.

“ _My_ favorite.”

Ignoring him, Harry added, “I love every moment I get with you whether it’s brief or charged with a lot of emotions. I think we can both be a little dramatic.” They giggled. “I’ve loved you since before you even asked me out. I’ve always loved how you are with your family and with mine and especially with me. You’re so sweet and you probably don’t even realize it. I know you lash out when you can’t contain your feelings and I also know you would never genuinely hurt me. So, please give us another shot. I need you.”

“You’re wrong about one thing.”

“Lou—”

Louis took hold of his wrists. Just to touch him. 

“I have genuinely hurt you. I ruined your proposal after the work you put into it. You fucking serenaded me after convincing me to go on a helicopter ride. You included our families in your plans... It was perfect! The most wonderful thing to ever happen to me.”

“It was worth it,” Harry said passionately. “You may have said no, and it did hurt to hear it, but you were right to reject me. I was way in over my head. I should have talked to you about marriage and what it meant for us. I just always assumed it was a sure thing and I didn’t want to wait any longer. ‘Age ain’t nothing but a number.’”

“Shut up.” They snickered. How were they so compatible? “Babe, why did you end things? I didn’t reject you because I didn’t want to be with you.”

“I thought it was necessary. I just didn’t know how to go back to normal. I was embarrassed and disappointed. I needed some time and before I knew it, several months had passed. I missed you and although I still saw you often, it felt like you resented me for putting you on the spot like that." Harry paused, lips turned down. "Do you? Do you resent me for proposing?”

“I’ll be honest. I think I did resent you at first. I thought surely it must not have meant as much to you as it did to me if you were able to let me go that easily. I don’t think you ever once looked me in the eyes when you packed up your stuff. It was like you couldn’t wait to get away from me after one 'no.'”

He didn’t realize he was crying again until Harry wiggled his wrists out of his hold in order to reach for the napkins that came with their meal. He took it upon himself to dab at Louis’ face and held the rest out so that Louis could blow his nose. Harry always took the best care of him. He was the loveliest person in his life. He wanted him so much.

“It wasn’t like that, was it? You love me? Even when I’m a piece of shit?”

“It wasn’t like that. And yes, I love you. Even when you’re a piece of shit, which, you’re actually not, so don’t express yourself in that way. I forgive you and I hope you can forgive me too.”

“Curly—”

“If you call me that and ruin our moment, I will take back everything.”

Feigning being scandalized, Louis reached out to tug at the curls that stuck out from beneath his beanie. 

“Tell me what you were happy about. When we were talking about Zayn.”

“Oh!” Harry’s mischievous grin returned. He resembled the Cheshire Cat. “Liam is like head over heels in love with Zayn.”

“Really?” Warmth spread though Louis’ chest. He knew it all along but having it confirmed by a reliable source made it feel official. “That _is_ amazing!”

Louis tugged a bit at his curls and Harry got the hint. He pressed his face close to Louis’ and kissed him gingerly. They stayed like that for a long moment, lips moving slowly with care. It was sweet. They hadn’t shared a kiss without a sex high in a while. He basked in it. 

Harry pulled back. “Niall was right.”

“About?”

“He told me we’d get our heads out of our asses soon.”

“What a sweet boy,” Louis quipped.

He felt like he was floating. The universe was on their side. They would be alright. There was still a list of things to talk about. Louis wanted to establish a clear line of communication and clear up whatever doubts might still be lingering. He was ready to pick up where they left off. He thought back to the song Harry proposed with. There were some lines that he’d forgotten and someday he’d ask Harry to sing it again so he could memorize the rest. There were also some lines that never left his memory. He didn’t often allow himself to drift into that territory. Now was a good time as they sat in Louis’ Toyota. 

_Sometimes it seems too good to be true,_

_It feels like a dream just being with you;_

_'cause I never thought that I’d get enough,_

_But I’m satisfied and filled with your love._

~~~

Upon returning to the street lined with student housing, Harry convinced Louis to not only drop him off but to join him. They had more catching up to do. Louis couldn’t agree more himself. Despite Harry being his top priority, however, he would have to set things right with Zayn and hopefully confirm their suspicions. The dorm was dark and Liam’s door was wide open. The boys weren’t there. Harry jokingly checked his own room and Louis smacked him. Gently. Harry took hold of that hand and led him to the bed. He then frowned as he observed the comforter. 

“You don’t think they actually…”

“Ugh. Thanks for ruining the moment. You’re back to being Curly Fry.”

Harry pouted. “I only respond to ‘love,’ ‘darling,’ ‘babe’—”

“Okay, okay!” Louis covered his mouth with his own and he felt Harry sigh into it. “Let’s change the sheets.”

“I’m already close. Just hearing you talk about domestic things. You’re so hot.”

Louis had to put a stop to the madness. He stripped the bed, Harry and himself in what he hoped was an impressive speed and laid his boy out in order to kiss every inch of his skin. He saved his dick for last, which Harry didn’t fail to point out. He licked the head a couple of times before suctioning his lips over it. Harry liked that the most. He wriggled beneath him, hips held down by Louis’ arm. With his free hand, Louis gripped the base and pumped upwards, never detaching his mouth. 

“Lou, Lou, Lou. Can I?”

Louis hummed and moved his head back a little, the crown of Harry’s cock sat on his lip, and a split second later, he tasted the first release. Harry watched with narrowed eyes. He already looked exhausted and fucked out, which wasn’t fair because Louis wanted to sit on his pretty cock.

He ruffled through his bedside drawer until he produced a small bottle of lube. Harry helped him pour it over his fingers but laid back and watched Louis open himself up. Louis was quick and a bit rough with himself. He was impatient and was just so fucking needy. Harry held his left hand while Louis situated himself properly and sank down on his length. And boy, it was a very satisfying length. He sat motionless for a second. Harry squeezed his hand and caressed his face with the other. 

“Go slow, baby.”

Although he started off slow, Louis was soon rocking his hips in the most tantalizing way. His heart raced as it probably stitched itself back together. Harry watched him with pink cheeks and wet eyes.

“You’re so beautiful, Lou. You should see yourself. I can’t look away.”

Since they became not-really-friends with benefits, Louis hadn’t allowed him to say those things. Otherwise, it would have been too much to deal with on top of the notion that it could be the last time.

“You should fuck me against your vanity.” Louis lifted himself and sank back down. “So I can look too.”

Harry moaned. “Anything you want.” He puckered his lips and slipped his hand to the back of Louis’ head. Louis folded himself down and kissed him eagerly, enjoying how Harry shifted and bent his knees so he could fuck up into him.

Louis was close. While he continued to kiss and tango with Harry’s tongue, Harry pushed in deeply and sparks flickered behind the backs of Louis’ eyelids. He rode it out while Harry pulsed inside him. They slowed down their lower halves but continued kissing with the enthusiasm that never faded.

There was a sudden rush of movement. Louis wasn’t too sure. He was feeling a lot of things. He suddenly found himself standing in front of the vanity. He watched his reflection, crimson cheeks, messy hair, swollen lips, and Harry’s hands coming up to grip his shoulders. He folded Louis over so that his forearms came up to rest on the vanity top and his ass presented itself. It only took an idle moment before Harry was lubed up again and sliding back in. Louis’ chest pressed up against the edge of the vanity. He knew it would not be long until joining Harry in post-coital land. Louis was its king. 

The same picture frames he’d observed the other evening stared back at him. He shuddered and flipped them over. Harry giggled in his ear. Louis looked at their reflection to watch Harry mouth along the side of his neck. He fucked him in a nice, smooth rhythm. Louis couldn’t look away.

Later, as they laid in bed, Louis held him in his arms. At daybreak, the room became a grayish purple hue because of Harry’s curtains. Louis hadn’t felt this calm and sated in all the time they’d been fucking around. He pressed a kiss against Harry’s temple and was surprised to find that he was also awake. They needed sleep but the high they felt since the drive from their Wendy’s pit stop had yet to clear. Harry was on the bend. He’d fall asleep soon.

“I’m stupidly in love with you, Harry Styles. I realize I haven’t said it yet but you know it, don’t you? That never changed and I’m positive it never will. You’re the best person in my world and I don’t want to live in it without you anymore.” He sighed. Louis hated being cheesy and sappy and what have you. Subsequently, he could hardly cap his happiness. Harry deserved to hear all about it. “I’ve gone too long without being properly with you and I’ve hated every second of it. Well, I mean, the sex was always good, don’t get me wrong. So good. Your jawline sharpens when you’re irritated with me and when you're horny. You always give it to me so well. And tonight was fucking spectacular. I’ll be sore tomorrow for sure.”

“You had to make your big declaration crude, didn’t you?”

Harry startled him. Not that Louis didn’t want him to hear every word, he assumed Harry was too exhausted to react, let alone sit up and settle over Louis. 

“You know me better than anyone.” He played with a curl. “I love you.”

Harry sniffled and hid his face against Louis’ chest. He kissed the skin there.

“I know.”

~~~

//Harry//

They lounged on the couch, legs tangled and hair dripping from their shower. Louis insisted on watching soccer and Harry insisted on watching Louis watch soccer. He’d prefer to watch him play with his shorts stretching tightly over his ass and his thigh muscles shifting with every move.

Everything about this boy fascinated him. He reminisced on the times when they were younger and Harry thought his crush was unrequited. He thought they were doomed to eternal friendship and nothing more. How foolish had he been? What a ridiculous notion that they were anything but eternally linked like a keyless lock on a chain.

His stepdad had been right. While Harry got ready for their first date, shaking with nerves, Rob told him there was nothing to worry about because Louis was a keeper. 

A goal and a cheer happened on the screen. Louis pursed his lips and demanded to be kissed. 

Harry would definitely keep him.

The door burst open and in came their roommates. Or probably soon-to-be ex-roommates since Harry planned to adjust their living arrangements. He’d talk to Louis about it later and he vowed to respect his answer. No matter what. 

Liam held Zayn from behind. While it should have looked awkward with the way they tried walking in unison, it was cute. Louis would probably give them shit for it. Harry couldn’t wait. The boys froze when they saw the couch was occupied. Liam dropped his arms and stepped back. 

“Hey guys…” he said, looking guilty.

“So, you finally figured your shit out,” Louis commented. 

Harry held back a giggle. 

Zayn crossed his arms. “I see you did too or are we still playing pretend?”

Harry turned to observe Louis who said a little hoarsely, “Ouch! No pretending here anymore, right, love?”

“Not at all, baby.” 

Liam and Zayn let out exaggerated groans and one of them fake gagged.

“I’m moving out,” Zayn announced. Liam glanced at him with a worried expression. 

“Well, Harry’s moving in so that’s settled.”

Harry couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Did Louis just ask him to move in? Without asking? To spite Zayn? Or?

“Are you serious, Lou?” 

Louis settled his gaze over Harry’s face. He kissed his cheek. “We can talk about it later. If you want.”

Harry didn’t like the uncertainty in the afterthought. They’d have time to work on it. “Absolutely.”

“I’m honestly very happy for you two,” Liam said, drawing the attention back to them. 

Zayn nodded his agreement. His hand found its way to Liam’s. Harry was interested in hearing how exactly they got to that point but for the meantime, it was enough to know things worked out for them.

“We’re happy for you, too. But I really need to know—”

“Louis, don’t,” Harry warned. 

Louis pressed another smacking kiss to his cheek. “How the hell did you guys end up hooking up in Harry’s room your first night?! Your room is literally right over there, Payne!”

There were times when Louis was cumbersome and loud. He was also very charming and mirthful. Mix it all together and Harry got one special boy.

“Liam forgot to turn on the lights,” Zayn admitted with a roll of his eyes, similar to Louis. Harry knew those two needed to have a chat but he wasn't ready to share Louis yet. He wanted to be selfish for a while longer. “We realized it was the wrong room before anything really happened.”

“Hang on,” Liam said pensively. “How did you know?” 

“They’re onto us, Curly! Run!” Louis sprang up and pulled Harry along with him. 

Laughing, Harry pulled Louis to a stop just beside his closed bedroom door. “They’ll think we have a camera in there.”

“Maybe they’ll look for our sex tapes.”

“Not interested!” Zayn shouted. The new lovebirds made their departure known by slamming the front door shut, presumably heading for Louis and Zayn’s place down the road. 

Between the two of them, Harry wasn’t sure who cackled louder. He guided Louis inside, watched him strip and then opened him up with his tongue and three fingers. 

“What are your plans this weekend?” Harry asked some time later. Balls deep. A typical Friday night. 

“Hmm, well…” Louis pressed his nails into Harry’s biceps. “Aiden invited me to his family holiday party.”

Harry's movements faltered. "No," he grunted. 

“No?”

“No.” He quickened his thrusts. 

“Did Nick invite you?”

“No." He pulled out almost completely and rammed back inside. "I have better plans for us.”

Louis winced. “Like what?”

Harry hitched Louis’ left leg around his waist. “Nothing sexual.”

“Boring,” Louis joked. He pinched Harry’s butt. 

“Gonna go home. Just you and me. Visit Rob. Gonna tell everyone we’re okay.”

“Okay.” Louis smiled.

Harry loved his face. “Love you,” he said, slowing down.

“Love you too but can we focus on the task at hand? I'm close. Family later.”

“Family later,” Harry agreed with a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thanks for reading! This is my first time participating in a fic fest so I was pretty nervous about this. Thank you to the lovely mods who set this up!
> 
> The song referenced in the first flashback is "The Beginning" by Alice Peacock. If you watched the finale of, "What I Like About You," you'll know hehe.
> 
> I'm thinking of turning this into a mini series. There are a few things that were left open-ended.
> 
> xx


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